How to learn not to take everything personally

There are periods of special sensitivity for everyone. Especially this summer, when we’re no longer surprised by the bad news. On such days, any remark from the mouth of a boyfriend or husband, girlfriend or boss is perceived as a cruel blow to ego, the only purpose of which is to offend you fatally. A mocking look, a random comment or a hint of criticism is enough to make you feel hurt in the heart and, crying, slam the door. In the office or in a friendly company, of course, everyone notices your emotional outburst, and what is really unfair happens: a label is glued to you too sensitive nature, and with such a “need to be more delicate, or her nerves seem to go to hell.

Not every woman can boast impenetrable self-confidence, and this is absolutely normal.

How to calm the boiling resentment and run instead of resentment analytical skills? There are three simple tips for that.

1. Stay calm and don’t react immediately

A colleague said a joke or a poisonous comment on your account. Of course, there is a reason to be outraged: he did the wrong thing. Having realized that, try not to run away in a rage and not to be rude in return. Take a deep breath and long exhale, repeating a short spell to yourself: everything that has been said in this room will remain in this room. Within a minute or two a colleague will get a chance to recognize his mistake and apologize to you. Probably, it will not come to him at once, but for other witnesses it will be obvious that you have an enviable endurance and boundless generosity.

2. Think about the reasons for the quarrel

Avoid immediate quarreling and baseless sobbing, take time to reflect on where the problem “legs grow”. Misunderstandings due to criticism often arise from the effect of surprise, when a conversation suddenly pops up a barbed note. The message, as well as the meaning of what is said can be interpreted in different ways.

3. Recognize the message

Human nature is such that mockery and comments spoil the mood of most of us, even if we manage to imitate the coolness in front of friends and colleagues. The good news is that you can use negative criticism for positive personal development, however, success depends directly on self-esteem. Time to sulk and run the process of self-analysis, honestly answering the question: why do you get hurt by such comments? Psychologists believe in this “acceptance”: if the comments about the nature or behavior hurt, perhaps there is some truth in them.

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